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Le Ciel ~
07 February 2012 @ 02:36 am
hmm been awhile since i last posted anything. not like i know what to post anyway. but i'm posting this as a promise to myself to change, as a resolution to be less of a horrible person.

as of feb 2012, i shall:
1. hate less
2. think less cynical / . thoughts
3. stop thinking negatively of people. even if their actions just scream so.
4. think everyone's a saint
5. stop pointing out people's ulterior motives
6. talk more
7. stone less
8. stop giving excuses not to follow this resolution
9. start to care.. more
10. stop being apathetic
11. start feeling more
12. blame myself more
13. try my best to understand others from their pov, even if what i really think is bigdeallifegoesondealwithit
14. stop talking like this
15. become a stronger, more independent & better person.

wow my list could go on and on but i'll stop at 15. gotta gotta gotta keep to this! for many many various reasons. hmm i think #2, 5, 10, 11, 13 is gonna be the most difficult. just a feelingggggggg :D
 
 
 
Le Ciel ~
28 January 2011 @ 05:57 pm


Okay hi ebi & trace, this is my long overdue list of ikemen jdrama actors. Honestly I really wanted to put KimuTaku in too because even though he is an idol, I can't disregard him as an actor! But if I put him in, then I'd need to put nino in too. and okura. and toma. and yeah, so in the end i only put solely ACTORS :(

Onto the list! )


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Current Music: nanamusica - kanata
 
 
Le Ciel ~
19 December 2010 @ 06:09 am

Its five in the morning & I know im supposed to be asleep but I don't think I'll have a good night's rest unless i get this out of my system first.

So just last night, I was asked, 'Why did I choose to go overseas to study' again, and almost instantly without thinking, i just gave my usual response, "Cus i wanna study theatre."

But honestly, I've been giving all sorts of different answers to all the different people who asked me this question. Honestly, I don't really know why I chose to study abroad either. Initially, I guess my "study theatre" response was an honest answer, but as time passed, I started not knowing what I really wanted to do either. Even now, I'm still a little hung up on giving up on design, and now that I've chosen University of Melbourne, I still can't decide between theatre & arts management. Really, I can't answer that question because I guess I've never really asked myself that before.

I thought that the two weeks spent in Vietnam would help clear my mind a little, but no matter how hard I thought about the answer to that question, or how seriously I considered my career choices, I still can't make a decision. And so, I just stopped thinking about it and just decided to go ahead with that one year of foundation studies. (Which, by the way, I'm really sorry, design course, maybe I do regret giving up on you a little, but if there's a chance in the future, I'll definitely look you up again!)

Which leads me to the next question - just like how i avoided thinking about that question, am I just merely runnning away? From being retained? From another year of school & being left behind by my other friends? Today, I really thought hard about this. And I came up with a conclusion - probably, part of me chose to study abroad because yes, I am running away. But from what? Because I know I really don't care about being retained, or having to spend an extra year in school when everyone has left.

And I realised that I'm running away because I don't know what to do with my life here. I'm stuck with subjects that will lead me to nowhere near reaching any of my goals, and I feel that the longer I stay here, the longer I'm gonna delay myself from moving forward. In a way, think of it as me being stagnant in a place where I know I don't belong, but I'm not moving because I don't want to make changes and leave my comfort zone.

So even though now, I'm still not sure of exactly what path I wish to take, or what path my decision will lead me to, I won't regret leaving this place, because at the very least, I've taken the first step in changing the world I live in, and who knows, maybe having a different view might allow me to know clearly what I want to do in the future. Afterall, I should practice what I preach, and since I always say my favourite quote is, "I believe that everything I am experiencing now will definitely have some meaning in my life.", I shouldn't be afraid of making changes anymore or have any doubts about my decision, and just go head on with it, do my best, and when the time comes, I think I will have my answers too :)


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Le Ciel ~
23 November 2010 @ 01:39 am
 







not what you think it is;
& neither what i thought it was.

 

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Le Ciel ~
15 November 2010 @ 12:37 am





Sometimes it's as though you've to bitch on the discriminated to be accepted.
Seriously, why so hateful D: ?
Surely if you try you can be more accepting?

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Le Ciel ~
10 November 2010 @ 02:49 am
 


The number of days people can love each other in one year :
365

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Le Ciel ~
08 November 2010 @ 03:13 pm






Your presumptions.


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Le Ciel ~
30 October 2010 @ 02:32 am





Can't help but blame yourself
for breaking the glass that fell on its own.

Or was it negligence,
complacency?

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Le Ciel ~
29 October 2010 @ 12:33 am
 







And so they said,
"Stop worrying about the past."
Please!

 

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Le Ciel ~
27 October 2010 @ 01:22 am







decipher  t h i s.

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